Life go's on

It has been awhile since I have written. I did speak to my birth mother on the phone. It was a very surreal experience for me. I mean there are only a few people in this world that I am related to by blood. We wanted to know each other but at the same time it was awkward because we did not know each other. I found out that she has lived most of her life in Alaska, she has one other daughter (different father), that I look like my birth father and that she has stage 4 colon cancer. We exchanged e-mails addresses and have left it at that. I am having a hard time bringing myself to be close to her so soon after losing my mom. I know I could not take it if we became close and she passed away, I would not recover. That being said I'm not sure how to go forward.